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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

ONE SMALL STEP AT A TIME



Thanksgiving 2014 approaches.
I can't think of many things I'm more thankful about than
the steps my feet have taken in my lifetime...
I wonder how many steps that was.
Stumbles .... leaps .... skips and jumps...
steps,
one at a time led me to this day,
this destination from there to 
here.
My steps are not as far reaching now .....
some hesitation and a few kinks to work out of my 
little old widder woman stride.
Purposeful 
carefully placed footsteps
not to fall!!!

Don't look back...
oh alright... look back.
Wonderful steps my feet have taken!
Very few taken alone ....
until lately.
Do I hear someone beside me?
Is that you Jesus...?
It could just be the leaves scrunching beneath my feet as I walk down the driveway ....
or Jack running beside me begging I toss his ball for him to fetch.
I'm never alone ... it only seems that way
until I close my eyes and see
my children ... all of them, and grands and great grands,
my friends
parents
siblings
and Eldon (he and Perro, Maggie always together....)
Tie up your tennies, old girl, and take a walk.
There's sure to be an adventure just around the next curve in the road.
A blessed and abundantly rich Thanksgiving to all.
There's so much to be thankful about.....
Post below is one of my favorite ... healing walks 
a short time after 
Eldon died.
I hope you enjoy it again,
or for the first time.
God bless!
....................................................

ONE small BUT DECISIVE STEP AT A TIME ......
and we all end up at our destination.


I hadn't walked down the hill to the Juniper forest in a few months .....
 the last time had been in the company of family and friends ..... 
along with numerous dogs and horses
to leave Eldon's ashes beneath the lone Pine Tree alongside the spring creek ... as were his wishes.




I chose a sunny but chilly day for my dog Perro 
and I to walk down to see if the snow had melted or if there were spring  flowers ...
or water running in the small creek that flowed past Eldon's tree.
On the walk down the hill I glanced behind me
and saw my neighbor's horses,
Teaser and Little Man,
 following,
all the while nibbling on sprigs of new grass just peeking out from a long cold winter. The horses had become part of my "family" over the years and I enjoyed their strong presence as I followed a
well- worn deer path to my destination.

My destination at the base of the Pine Tree
often brought tears of sadness
or smiles of gladness,
remembering that I had shared in this man's life for 53 years.
Shared in the steps he had taken,
often leading his family to new adventures.

I didn't stay long that day ... there were no spring flowers to
decorate the still-drab landscape .... a few small dirty snow drifts
in the shadows only lent to the loneliness I felt.

I patted the stump of a tree we'd placed 
beneath the shadows of the Pine Tree
to mark the resting place for his ashes, and left a few glittering stones he would have liked,
 then
began the slow journey back up the hill to my house.

Perro lept across the  shallow meandering creek
as I carefully chose my steps....
a dry rock here ... a clump of dirt filled weeds,
onto a flat rock, and I was safely on the other side.
It was chilly.
I had on a flannel shirt,
not warm enough for comfort.
I began the short but steep trudge up the hill to my house.

One step at a time,
I thought, and stop to rest every few steps.
How I wish I was in better shape ... asthma and bronchitis
had taken a toll on my stamina over the long cold winter.

After my third or fourth stop to rest a bit
I felt a warm breath
and soft snuffling noises behind me.
It was Teaser,
my neighbors old but
long legged, strong Tennessee Walker.
He towered over me,
black and beautiful from mane to tail, still wearing the face guard that kept pesky bugs away from his face.


I stopped.
He stopped ... then took a step,
his long mane waving and reaching down to my shoulder.
I grabbed his mane.
And he continued walking up the hill,
at a slow but steady pace,
with me holding his mane ....
not breathless or distressed anymore about the climb
in front of me.
I had help.
I had company.
I had a friend to help my steps up the steep climb.

When repairs need to be made
some steps have to be taken alone ....


Other steps will lead us to treasures beyond our wildest dreams...

..
Mountain or roof top experiences make you feel like
King of the World
from taking one small, carefully placed step at a time

or keep in step in the company of heroes ......

Dance, one step at a time, into a new life with your beloved...

or one small, slow,
sad step at a time 
to bring a loved one to his final resting place

A shoulder to lean on, one step at a time, gives courage and strength when needed the most. 

A mother's firm grasp
keeps small steppers out of danger.



A band of brothers ... climbing, discovering in each other's footsteps.

A mother and daughter ... in step,
past a field of summer flowers,
walking together in the footprints  
of God's 
creation.


And when you want to soar with giant footsteps
into the wild blue yonder
the help of a stranger
can steady you while waiting for the right course of the wind.


tiny baby footsteps alongside of mommy.....



and a son's running and leaping into Daddy's arms ...
he'd been gone a  long time.

And just when you think
you've done it all
in your long lifetime,
and walked many paths and had amazing adventures ...
you're just apt to come across
a creature only to happy to give you a ride ..
in his long reaching stride...
only leading you to the next
adventure ...
but you won't get there
unless you take
one small
step
at
a time.






Saturday, November 26, 2011

HEARTS AND HANDS FOREVER ....

HEARTS AND HANDS FOREVER ....

Writing .... art .... composing music
 are "hearts and hands"
 forms of creativity that brings meaning and "soul" into our lives
.
Similarly, producing a child ... or children
has been the ultimate creativity for me.
Four canvases ..... pure and untouched before birth.
Upon taking their first breath,
the "colors" and dimensions,
perspective and depth
of my life took on a 
brilliant hue I never knew existed in
God's rainbow!
You might assume I'm a young mother.....watching and guarding
my offspring, nurturing and guiding.
However ..... I'm a Little Old Widder Woman

rejoicing in the memories
of once-upon-a-time
holding their tiny feet in my smooth hands....
baby cheek to my unlined cheek ...
gazing into baby-blues (one baby has baby-greenish)
with my bifocal-less
20x20  vision.
Time passes so quickly ....
only old people think so.
But I'm not old-old yet ... simply old.

But when I become old-old
I'll have my creased and worried brow
wiped 
and parched and crackled lips
refreshed by
soft and gentle great-grandchildrens' hands.

I'll try to pull memories to share with them from my
filled-to-the-brim old-old brain.....
adventures and misadventures of their grandparents
and parents
and great-grandparents
(that would be me and Eldon)

And in my final hours,
they will gather around
and coax me to eat just one more bite...
rest a bit because I'm about to go on my
biggest adventure ever .....
and
tell them one more time how I swam with
a whale shark in the Sea of Cortez ...
or helped save a whale from a beach in La Paz.

However .....
Old-Old just 'aint me yet!!!!!
Pardon me for now,
but I have to go out to the barn and
feed my neighbor's horses and clean out the stalls,
fix a rail on my fence that fell after the last snow storm,
and
continue the long overdue finishing touches on my
Unfinished Masterpiece
"Family Treasures"

Hmm,
let's see ....
I think I'll work on
the family treasures in
this little
jewelry box ...



I have lots of stories to tell after being away from my blog
for a few months.
I've missed chatting with you ......