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Saturday, June 11, 2011

WEEDS CHOKING OUT THE FLOWERS

DEAR FRIEND ......  I just watched an inspiring video on my computer. It's about a woman who weighed 589 pounds three years ago. She lost 3oo pounds .... 100 pounds per year! The video is called: Woman Loses 300 Pounds The Old Fashioned Way
ABC News
I'm sharing this with you because you have expressed such distress about your weight.
I was very concerned about you the last time we talked. Stress from your job, overweight, regrets and perhaps past injuries to your self esteem have taken a toll.
I want to share a my own simplistic story:

It had been a year since Eldon died. I was in an extremely distressed frame of mind one day while walking through my garden that should have been filled with flowers .... instead was a weed infested wasteland. I felt angry to be alone to deal with the weeds ...overburdened by the work piling up around my home and garden. Weeds .... weeds.... weeds.



                       He just wasn't there to help ........................
Sad and anxious about the weeds choking out my flower beds,
I started to cry.....
Then I heard that small gentle voice of God say,
"If you only see the weeds you'll miss the flowers."

I looked down ... and ever so small, I saw a tiny Johny Jump-up smiling back up at me.


They have such adorable tiny faces!
I almost missed them because I was stuck in seeing only the weeds.
.........................................
I wish I had a magic wand that would zap you into the life you want ....
but that seems out of my reach. If I could do that for you
I'd turn the wand back onto myself
to be transported back to the life
that brought me such happiness
and a share of sadness.
I have to keep seeing the flowers in my life ......
 actively pull out the weeds.
Get rid of them...
be involved in becoming the "flower" God sees me to be.
................................
After Eldon had been gone almost a year
I was having difficulty sleeping,
outbursts of tears and self pity..
didn't want to do anything that had once brought
much satisfaction and joy.....
painting, writing, seeking out my friends and family..
studying God's Word.
I put on a brave face and went to work, church ...."Oh yes, I'm doing fine"
talked with my family members, friends ...
but felt broken and lost inside.
That's to be expected ...
mourning the death of a loved one takes time.
We all mourn the loss of something... a loved one
or ourself.
.............
Dear friend,
Are you mourning the loss of that person you hoped to be ... but can't seem to attain?
...............
I called my doctor and she prescribed  medication,
which I took daily as prescribed for over a year...
until one day
I seemed less anxious .... realized I could go days into weeks without the debilitating sadness.
I was actively attacking "the weeds" that were choking out the life I knew was there for me.
...............
Healing was taking place in a clinical way to help bring
me back ..... and I'm back! 90% back.
I am taking active steps and time that it takes to heal the sense of loss, hurt and sadness ..
I'm pulling out the weeds as they sprout
and giving the flowers a chance to grow.
.................................
I don't walk in your shoes....
I don't experience your sadness, regrets, stresses you live through.
But I know about your victories!
A wonderful family, home, career, relationship with God,
financial security, the gift of song!
.......................
But your garden is being choked out by the weeds ....
and you're missing the flowers that are trying to grow.
..............
Clear a path for the flowers in your life ...
pick up a weed-eater
and destroy those issues
that you have control of
that are causing you the most pain ....
and slowly,  
your garden will begin to burst with the beauty that you so
desperately want.... and deserve.
.................
We all have "weeds".....
addiction, weight, anger, childhood abuse, despair over the death of a loved one.
Attack those weeds
because they can take over your garden
and leave it a wasteland.
And don't give up!
Because weeds have a habit of cropping back up
from time to time to choke out the beauty
that is you!
.......................
I love you
dear friend!
And admire and respect you...
you are beautiful
kind
gentle
strong.
And deserve a beautiful garden!!

All my love, devotion, and prayers.....
oh yeah
one more thing...
fertilizer!
Don't forget the fertilizer!
for your
garden.
Monica




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